Should Wives Submit To Their Husbands?

WEBVTT 1 00:00:00.400 --> 00:00:07.549 Well, let's turn now to Ephesians chapter five and continue where we left off 2 00:00:08.429 --> 00:00:18.269 in this book effusions Chapter Five. I'm focusing tonight on the instructions that are 3 00:00:18.309 --> 00:00:26.379 given two wives, instruction, House household instructions, sometimes our household codes, 4 00:00:26.460 --> 00:00:30.460 or rules, these are sometimes called. That's in verses twenty through through twenty 5 00:00:30.539 --> 00:00:36.570 four, but I would like to begin reading in Verse Fifteen and read all 6 00:00:36.649 --> 00:00:41.969 the way through thirty three, since we will be spending them some time over 7 00:00:42.049 --> 00:00:48.689 the next few weeks on this passage. So if Usians five, Verse Fifteen, 8 00:00:48.729 --> 00:00:56.759 nine hundred and seventy eight in this Bible, look carefully, then how 9 00:00:56.799 --> 00:01:00.960 you walk, not as unwise but as wise making the best use of time, 10 00:01:02.119 --> 00:01:04.750 because the days are evil. Therefore, do not be foolish, but 11 00:01:04.909 --> 00:01:08.909 understand what the will of the Lord is. Do not get drunk with wine, 12 00:01:08.989 --> 00:01:12.750 for that is debauchery, but be filled with the spirit, addressing one 13 00:01:12.750 --> 00:01:18.739 another in psalms hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord 14 00:01:18.780 --> 00:01:22.540 with your heart, giving thanks always and for everything to God, the father, 15 00:01:23.019 --> 00:01:26.980 in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, submitting to one another out 16 00:01:26.019 --> 00:01:32.019 of reverence for Christ, wives submit to your own husband's as to the Lord, 17 00:01:32.739 --> 00:01:36.010 for the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is 18 00:01:36.129 --> 00:01:38.930 the head of the church, his body, and is himself its savior. 19 00:01:40.810 --> 00:01:44.849 Now as the Church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything 20 00:01:44.969 --> 00:01:49.920 to their husband's husband's love your wives, as Christ loved the Church and gave 21 00:01:49.959 --> 00:01:53.079 himself up for her that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the 22 00:01:53.159 --> 00:01:57.519 washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to 23 00:01:57.560 --> 00:02:00.709 himself and splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she 24 00:02:00.750 --> 00:02:05.709 might be holy and without blemish. In the same way, husband should love 25 00:02:05.750 --> 00:02:08.710 their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself, 26 00:02:09.389 --> 00:02:13.830 for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, 27 00:02:14.509 --> 00:02:19.139 just as Christ does the church, because we are all members of his body. 28 00:02:20.699 --> 00:02:23.699 Therefore, a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to 29 00:02:23.860 --> 00:02:28.340 his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. This mystery is profound, 30 00:02:28.340 --> 00:02:31.650 and I am saying that it refers to Christ in the church. However, 31 00:02:31.969 --> 00:02:36.370 let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the 32 00:02:36.449 --> 00:02:40.849 wife see that she respects her husband. Says God's Word May he bless it 33 00:02:40.930 --> 00:02:59.949 to us, he may be seated well's. We come to this past sage, 34 00:03:00.590 --> 00:03:04.349 we come to a section in Paul's letter here to the Ephesians where he 35 00:03:04.389 --> 00:03:13.539 gives instructions to various Christians in their various circumstances, focusing particularly on our homes, 36 00:03:14.180 --> 00:03:17.379 the ways in which we ought to live in our homes and in our 37 00:03:17.460 --> 00:03:23.860 relationships with one another in our homes. That's important to know that this passage 38 00:03:24.180 --> 00:03:29.689 doesn't come out of thin air, nor is it just lifted out from one 39 00:03:29.729 --> 00:03:36.409 of the great philosophers or or some other source from Paul is giving us here 40 00:03:36.610 --> 00:03:42.840 the words and the will of God, as it corresponds and connects with what 41 00:03:42.960 --> 00:03:47.840 he has said before this. Were these words about look carefully how you walk, 42 00:03:47.879 --> 00:03:52.560 or wives submitting to their husband's or huzzy husband's loving their wives, and 43 00:03:52.960 --> 00:03:58.710 further instructions that will receive. They come on the heels of a much discussion 44 00:03:58.750 --> 00:04:03.750 and much explanation about what it means to be in Christ, about who we 45 00:04:03.870 --> 00:04:09.990 are in him and who we are for one another in a Christian household, 46 00:04:10.580 --> 00:04:15.340 particularly in one where both the husband and the wife are Christians, who are 47 00:04:15.539 --> 00:04:19.300 both who are made on being remade in the image of God and the image 48 00:04:19.339 --> 00:04:26.370 of their savior. Both who belong to this wonderful and eternal kingdom and who's 49 00:04:26.410 --> 00:04:30.930 God, whoever received God's blessings pouring out on them, have this amazing dignity 50 00:04:31.490 --> 00:04:43.040 and and amazing worth that is to be respected and shown and demonstrated in our 51 00:04:43.120 --> 00:04:49.079 lives together as Christians, but within the home as well. That these verses 52 00:04:49.319 --> 00:04:55.949 here to wives in particular, and verses twenty two through twenty four are connected 53 00:04:56.110 --> 00:05:01.990 with the previous verses is evident for all kinds of reasons. One very easy 54 00:05:02.149 --> 00:05:09.339 one, which doesn't show up so clearly in our English translations, is that 55 00:05:09.819 --> 00:05:13.500 verses Twenty One and twenty two, though most of our bibles have a little 56 00:05:14.100 --> 00:05:17.100 division there, and for good reason. It is a new section, they 57 00:05:17.139 --> 00:05:21.250 are connected. So, for Verse Twenty One it says submitting to one another 58 00:05:21.290 --> 00:05:26.529 out of reverence for Christ, and Verse Twenty Two really does in a in 59 00:05:26.649 --> 00:05:29.610 Greek it doesn't really have a verb. It just says wives to your husband's 60 00:05:29.649 --> 00:05:33.490 as to the Lord. Well, what our wives to their husbands supposed to 61 00:05:33.569 --> 00:05:38.920 do? Well, it's borrowing the verb that came just before that, namely 62 00:05:39.040 --> 00:05:43.480 the verb submitting right, and that's the reason it's supplied here in our English 63 00:05:43.519 --> 00:05:46.959 translations. We are called to submit to one another out of reverence. And 64 00:05:47.160 --> 00:05:51.990 now, in that context, Paul wants to think about other kinds of submission 65 00:05:53.629 --> 00:05:59.350 that happen in our lives, and these passages are connected and worthy and and 66 00:05:59.870 --> 00:06:05.620 therefore ought to be reflected on together. So, in this verse, previous 67 00:06:05.660 --> 00:06:10.019 to our passage, Paul says that we ought to be submitting to one another 68 00:06:10.699 --> 00:06:14.899 in Christ. This is a rule for a king as much as it is 69 00:06:15.060 --> 00:06:18.250 for a beggar. A king ought to submit to a beggar or one of 70 00:06:18.370 --> 00:06:24.970 his subjects, if in Christ, just as much as the beggar submits to 71 00:06:25.089 --> 00:06:34.000 the king different ways, in different aspects, but nevertheless the same. Our 72 00:06:34.079 --> 00:06:38.759 distinctions, as we see in these household colds, don't go away. Wives 73 00:06:38.800 --> 00:06:42.920 don't cease to be wives, husbands don't cease to be husbands, men don't 74 00:06:42.959 --> 00:06:46.879 cease to be men, women don't cease to be women in Christ. But 75 00:06:46.000 --> 00:06:49.670 there is a kind of unity that we have in one and with with and 76 00:06:49.870 --> 00:06:54.790 I suppose he in in a sense in Christ, in with one another, 77 00:06:55.709 --> 00:07:00.860 and that must be respected. This is why partiality in the church on the 78 00:07:01.939 --> 00:07:08.620 is often condemned. Raising up the wealthy, for example, on two seats 79 00:07:08.660 --> 00:07:15.930 of prominence or giving them special respect is not right. No, we submission 80 00:07:16.009 --> 00:07:21.730 to one another. Why? Out of reverence for Christ. But, as 81 00:07:21.810 --> 00:07:27.329 I say, that doesn't, and Paul says more importantly, that doesn't mean 82 00:07:27.529 --> 00:07:32.399 all order, all distinctions go out the window. Why is that? Well, 83 00:07:32.480 --> 00:07:36.519 yes, God has established a new covenant in Christ, but that has 84 00:07:36.600 --> 00:07:43.000 not abrogated the no way covenant, in which God's covenant of Common Grace Continues 85 00:07:43.560 --> 00:07:47.870 and instructions which began even in creation will continue to the end. God has 86 00:07:47.910 --> 00:07:55.029 instituted government and justice and marriage for good reasons. These are institutions ordained by 87 00:07:55.110 --> 00:07:59.459 him and in this world. And though there will be no marriage in heaven, 88 00:07:59.500 --> 00:08:03.699 we are not yet in heaven. There are still there is still marriage, 89 00:08:03.740 --> 00:08:07.220 there is still family structures, there are still governments that we owe a 90 00:08:07.379 --> 00:08:11.620 submission to. So, though marriage is not a part of the new creation, 91 00:08:11.779 --> 00:08:16.129 new creature, new creatures living in the world, ought to respect it 92 00:08:16.689 --> 00:08:22.410 and live in it because of the Lord. We do not have a right 93 00:08:22.569 --> 00:08:30.480 to overthrow the no way a covenant because God has established it and promises to 94 00:08:30.560 --> 00:08:37.559 keep it. In effect until the very end. And so we come to 95 00:08:37.879 --> 00:08:41.950 this passage tonight, which I'm going to spend at least a couple weeks on. 96 00:08:41.110 --> 00:08:48.190 Verses Twenty three, two to twenty four. Let me read just this 97 00:08:48.470 --> 00:08:52.110 narrow passage against that we might have it in our minds. Lives, submit 98 00:08:52.149 --> 00:08:56.539 to your own husband's, as to the Lord, for the husband is the 99 00:08:56.620 --> 00:08:58.259 head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the body, 100 00:09:00.299 --> 00:09:03.580 or's the head of the church, his body and is himself as savior. 101 00:09:03.419 --> 00:09:07.259 Now as the Church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their 102 00:09:07.299 --> 00:09:13.929 husband's in everything. I'm sorry, should submit in everything to their husband's. 103 00:09:16.409 --> 00:09:22.169 I want to deal with a few different questions over the course of the next 104 00:09:22.210 --> 00:09:28.000 couple or maybe even three weeks. The first question is the one will deal 105 00:09:28.159 --> 00:09:33.120 with tonight, which is should we be embarrassed or afraid about this passage? 106 00:09:35.200 --> 00:09:41.509 Is it a misguided or culturally irrelevant passage? Is it even a dangerous passage? 107 00:09:41.710 --> 00:09:45.629 That's the question we'll deal with tonight. How do we how do we 108 00:09:45.750 --> 00:09:50.590 think about what this is saying? How do we approach it? I then, 109 00:09:50.350 --> 00:09:54.700 in a second sermon, I'm going to deal with some of the specifics 110 00:09:54.539 --> 00:10:00.580 what does it mean? What does it mean to submit, and how can 111 00:10:00.620 --> 00:10:05.700 we grow in wisdom and those commands? Paul says in Verse Fifteen, look 112 00:10:05.700 --> 00:10:09.009 carefully how you walk, not as unwise but as wise. What are some 113 00:10:09.090 --> 00:10:13.649 specific ways we can think about doing that? How do we think about these 114 00:10:13.769 --> 00:10:20.759 commands and do them in light of Christ? So, as I said, 115 00:10:20.799 --> 00:10:24.720 the first question I want to deal with, the question for tonight, is 116 00:10:24.799 --> 00:10:30.120 how do we approach this passage in particular? Should we be embarrassed about it 117 00:10:30.200 --> 00:10:35.909 or afraid of it? Now, some of you will hear that question and 118 00:10:37.029 --> 00:10:43.029 go huh, why in the world would I be embarrassed about a passage in 119 00:10:43.070 --> 00:10:50.419 the Bible? Why would I be afraid of it? I'm perhaps that question 120 00:10:50.940 --> 00:10:56.259 seems strange to you because you are a child and blessed to live in a 121 00:10:56.460 --> 00:11:03.490 home that is godly and well ordered and beautiful, though you know for beyond 122 00:11:03.529 --> 00:11:07.809 the shadow of a doubt that neither of your parents are perfect and that they 123 00:11:07.850 --> 00:11:13.649 struggle, nevertheless, you see God's commands being fulfilled in order on the right 124 00:11:13.769 --> 00:11:18.840 path, and you there is nothing about this passage that seems odd or strange, 125 00:11:20.639 --> 00:11:26.360 just the opposite. It's something you aspire to and desire for yourselves and 126 00:11:26.519 --> 00:11:31.679 all that, I say keep on keeping on. It's a great and wonderful 127 00:11:31.720 --> 00:11:35.629 thing. The Lord has given us every passage of scripture not only to know 128 00:11:37.149 --> 00:11:41.950 and grow in, but to delight in and rejoice and this is very clearly 129 00:11:41.990 --> 00:11:46.669 law, law that is given to us by our king, to us and 130 00:11:46.789 --> 00:11:50.059 how we ought to live as citizens of his kingdom. When David talks about 131 00:11:50.100 --> 00:11:54.980 the law, he says it's sweeter to him than the drippings of a honeycomb. 132 00:11:54.700 --> 00:11:58.340 If this is a Christian way of talking about the law of the Lord, 133 00:12:00.139 --> 00:12:03.809 and if we are Christians as those who no longer fear the condemnation of 134 00:12:03.850 --> 00:12:07.889 the law, if we are those who have been justified in Christ know that 135 00:12:07.970 --> 00:12:11.090 we have peace with him through the blood on the cross, we have the 136 00:12:11.250 --> 00:12:16.120 great blessing and liberty of approaching the law of God in a healthy way, 137 00:12:16.879 --> 00:12:20.840 in a happy way, in a way that sees its goodness, it's beauty, 138 00:12:20.960 --> 00:12:28.320 it's order, it's reflectioned of God himself and his will for us. 139 00:12:28.559 --> 00:12:33.830 So to those of you who understand it in this way, it is good 140 00:12:35.309 --> 00:12:39.029 and right. But I know that is not all of us. In fact, 141 00:12:39.389 --> 00:12:43.980 maybe not even many of us. Perhaps for you, being embarrassed or 142 00:12:45.019 --> 00:12:50.059 afraid of this passage makes a lot of sense, because that's exactly how you 143 00:12:50.179 --> 00:12:56.580 feel about it. You may even agree in principle with it and say, 144 00:12:56.700 --> 00:13:00.809 okay, because of I know who God because of what I know of God 145 00:13:01.009 --> 00:13:05.009 and who he is, because of what I know about him and his words, 146 00:13:05.049 --> 00:13:09.009 I'm committed to the fact that this should be delightful. I'm committed to 147 00:13:09.090 --> 00:13:16.080 the fact that this should be right and holy and good. But honestly, 148 00:13:16.039 --> 00:13:22.320 I have bad feelings about it. I struggle towards a passage like this. 149 00:13:24.679 --> 00:13:26.789 That's what I want to deal with tonight. How do we approach it? 150 00:13:26.870 --> 00:13:31.429 How do we think about it? And light of those concerns, the first 151 00:13:31.470 --> 00:13:35.149 thing I want you to I want you to know and I want to say 152 00:13:35.309 --> 00:13:39.909 is that if you have a bad feelings about a passage, you are committed 153 00:13:39.990 --> 00:13:48.659 to as being good. I understand. It's happened to me plenty of times 154 00:13:50.500 --> 00:13:54.620 and in fact it happens to us all. Not a single one of us 155 00:13:54.740 --> 00:14:01.490 ever comes to any passage of scripture with complete understanding, perfect interpretation and a 156 00:14:01.529 --> 00:14:05.330 hundred percent faith and joy and love in the Lord Jesus. All of us 157 00:14:05.370 --> 00:14:11.159 struggle, for different reasons and in different ways with different passages of scripture. 158 00:14:11.159 --> 00:14:16.639 Why? Because there's ignorance, misunderstanding, the flesh is still in us and 159 00:14:18.200 --> 00:14:22.399 the temptations of the devil and all kinds of other reasons. We struggle with 160 00:14:22.559 --> 00:14:26.870 God's word and for the same reason we struggle with God's will and God himself, 161 00:14:26.950 --> 00:14:33.389 even though we belong to him, even though we're his children. It's 162 00:14:33.470 --> 00:14:39.259 part of the process of sanctification to recognize this fact and to trust in the 163 00:14:39.419 --> 00:14:45.460 Lord to help us to grow. That being said, I don't want to 164 00:14:45.460 --> 00:14:48.539 just end there and say well, let's move on, because I know that 165 00:14:48.620 --> 00:14:52.700 the problem goes deeper than that. In fact, I'd like tonight to deal 166 00:14:52.779 --> 00:14:56.649 with some of those challenges and concerns and bad feelings that we have head on 167 00:14:58.330 --> 00:15:03.529 and think about them in a way that recognizes the things Paul has been saying 168 00:15:03.610 --> 00:15:09.840 in Ephesians about who we are in Christ and who he is as our savior. 169 00:15:11.120 --> 00:15:13.759 And so it's in that spirit, or rather in the spirit, that 170 00:15:13.919 --> 00:15:18.480 we ought to have some honesty about why we struggle with a passage like this, 171 00:15:18.720 --> 00:15:22.710 in which God commands wives to submit to their husband's and then to think 172 00:15:22.750 --> 00:15:28.549 about those struggles in light of Christ. Well, the first one I want 173 00:15:28.750 --> 00:15:31.710 to talk about, the first, I think, reason for bad feeling, 174 00:15:33.629 --> 00:15:39.179 bad feelings, reasons for concern, is a very big one, and it 175 00:15:39.379 --> 00:15:46.419 is abuse. Some of you struggle with this command in the scriptures to submit 176 00:15:46.620 --> 00:15:52.450 wives, to submit to their husband's because you've seen this passage and others like 177 00:15:52.649 --> 00:15:58.649 it abused. And sadly that's not not all because of the because the abuse 178 00:15:58.769 --> 00:16:04.919 of the text is often done is justification for abuse of a person, which 179 00:16:04.960 --> 00:16:12.200 is never okay. Take this person, for example, Lady of Ruth Tucker, 180 00:16:12.279 --> 00:16:17.360 who has recent recently written a memoir in which she describes her nineteen year 181 00:16:17.519 --> 00:16:23.789 marriage to a pastor who screamed and beat her while quoting Bible verses like Ephesians 182 00:16:23.909 --> 00:16:33.460 Five, twenty two through twenty four, or this horrific quote from page Patterson, 183 00:16:33.740 --> 00:16:40.259 former president of the Southern Baptist Association and Pastor. I had a woman, 184 00:16:40.299 --> 00:16:41.620 he says, who was in a church that I served and she was 185 00:16:41.740 --> 00:16:47.059 being subject to some abuse and I told her, I said, all right, 186 00:16:47.809 --> 00:16:49.450 what you want to do is every evening I want you to get down 187 00:16:49.570 --> 00:16:52.610 by your bed just when he goes to sleep, get down by the bed 188 00:16:53.169 --> 00:16:56.210 and when you think he's just about to sleep, you just pray and ask 189 00:16:56.289 --> 00:17:00.289 God to intervene, not out loud, quietly, but I said you just 190 00:17:00.409 --> 00:17:04.880 pray there, and I said get ready, because he may get a little 191 00:17:04.880 --> 00:17:08.680 more violent, you know, when he discovers this. And sure enough he 192 00:17:08.759 --> 00:17:14.119 did. She came to church one morning with both eyes black and she was 193 00:17:14.240 --> 00:17:17.549 angry at me and at God in the world for that matter, and she 194 00:17:17.630 --> 00:17:19.390 said, I hope you're happy, and I said yes, ma'am, I 195 00:17:19.509 --> 00:17:23.349 am, and I said I'm sorry about that, but I am very happy. 196 00:17:25.470 --> 00:17:29.390 Why was he happy? Well, because later that man came forward at 197 00:17:29.430 --> 00:17:33.220 an altar call. Well, assuming that her husband's conversion was generous, then 198 00:17:33.220 --> 00:17:37.099 yes, of course we rejoice at his salvation along with all of the angels 199 00:17:37.180 --> 00:17:42.819 in heaven. But there's nothing about this scenario that is okay, nothing about 200 00:17:42.859 --> 00:17:48.369 it that is happy. This story should be in embarrassment and a shame, 201 00:17:48.890 --> 00:17:53.930 an extreme low point in pastoral ministry, not something to be proud of and 202 00:17:55.170 --> 00:18:00.839 share publicly. Suffering is a part of our lives, of course it is 203 00:18:02.559 --> 00:18:06.759 in a world marked by sin, but that, my friends, doesn't make 204 00:18:06.960 --> 00:18:11.319 suffering a good thing. It's something that Jesus went to the cross to overcome. 205 00:18:12.829 --> 00:18:15.829 It's something that he went to the Cross and suffered so that he could 206 00:18:15.829 --> 00:18:21.990 finally end suffering. And when he comes again, he promises to take every 207 00:18:22.109 --> 00:18:29.259 unrepentant abuser and cast them into hell forever, including Satan, the greatest abuser 208 00:18:29.339 --> 00:18:34.140 of them all. Why? So that we can be completely free of and 209 00:18:34.339 --> 00:18:38.619 finally free of evil and oppression and abuse forever. This is why he is 210 00:18:38.700 --> 00:18:44.490 our king to free us, to liberate us, to save us, to 211 00:18:44.609 --> 00:18:52.970 heal us. Now, a theology of suffering is worth examining and thinking very 212 00:18:52.009 --> 00:19:00.000 carefully about, and there's much too much to say. But let me just 213 00:19:00.160 --> 00:19:04.880 be clear about this. If you are being physically abused, emotionally abused, 214 00:19:04.960 --> 00:19:10.750 mentally abused, Ifhesians Five, twenty two through twenty four does not require you 215 00:19:10.869 --> 00:19:17.750 to submit to it, you are not required to put your life in danger 216 00:19:18.509 --> 00:19:22.309 because of this passage. God does not require it. How do we know 217 00:19:22.509 --> 00:19:26.940 this? Justin Holcomb, in his book, Good Book, book. Is 218 00:19:27.019 --> 00:19:33.059 it my fault, points this out. One of the most compelling reasons and 219 00:19:33.220 --> 00:19:37.019 the ways in which we which we see the right that we have to preserve 220 00:19:37.140 --> 00:19:41.890 our lives and the lives of others is Jesus himself. I find this very 221 00:19:41.970 --> 00:19:48.170 compelling. Yes, Jesus came into the world to suffer and to die, 222 00:19:48.730 --> 00:19:52.609 but again, this was not because suffering was good, it was to overcome 223 00:19:52.769 --> 00:19:56.400 suffering. The second thing to notice is that throughout his life, Jesus continually 224 00:19:56.440 --> 00:20:03.480 escaped suffering at many times and in many ways. It started even when he 225 00:20:03.599 --> 00:20:06.680 was a baby. His parents were warned by an angel that he was about 226 00:20:06.720 --> 00:20:11.630 to be killed and they fled to Egypt. And Matthew Two and as an 227 00:20:11.630 --> 00:20:15.190 adult, many times we read that Jesus got out of the way of danger 228 00:20:15.349 --> 00:20:19.470 in order to save his life, Matthew Twelve, fourteen through sixteen says, 229 00:20:19.789 --> 00:20:25.059 but the Pharisees went out and plotted how they might kill Jesus. Aware of 230 00:20:25.220 --> 00:20:30.700 this, Jesus withdrew from that place. Jesus didn't say, well, if 231 00:20:30.740 --> 00:20:34.299 it's suffering, I must endure it. No, he knew it and he 232 00:20:34.579 --> 00:20:40.569 withdrew. and Jesus, of course, is righteous and holy and everything that 233 00:20:40.609 --> 00:20:45.009 he does and they were the example for us to follow. John Fifty eight 234 00:20:45.049 --> 00:20:48.210 through fifty nine. At this they picked up stones to stone him, but 235 00:20:48.329 --> 00:20:55.920 Jesus hid himself slipping away from the Temple Ground John Thirty nine. Again, 236 00:20:56.000 --> 00:21:00.759 his Jewish opponents picked up stones to stone him. Again they tried to seize 237 00:21:00.759 --> 00:21:07.630 him, but he escaped their grasp. To preserve your life and to preserve 238 00:21:07.789 --> 00:21:14.829 the lives of others, it's okay to not submit. It's okay to flee, 239 00:21:15.069 --> 00:21:19.420 to run, to preserve your health and the health of others. Jesus 240 00:21:19.539 --> 00:21:22.460 doesn't just do this for himself, but he tells his disciples to do this. 241 00:21:22.859 --> 00:21:27.180 In Matthew Twenty three says when you are persecuted in one place, that's 242 00:21:27.220 --> 00:21:34.569 even for his name. He says flee to another place that is and we 243 00:21:34.650 --> 00:21:38.890 see the Apostle Paul doing exactly that a number of times. He fled from 244 00:21:38.890 --> 00:21:44.490 abusive civil and religious authorities, as wholcombe points out, and acts twenty two, 245 00:21:44.809 --> 00:21:48.440 twenty five through twenty nine. At one point Paul would have had the 246 00:21:48.599 --> 00:21:56.279 opportunity to endure an unjust and illegal beating in the name of Christ, an 247 00:21:56.359 --> 00:22:03.390 opportunity right, to endure this for the sake of Jesus, but instead he 248 00:22:03.549 --> 00:22:07.470 makes use of the Roman law to avoid it. And there's nothing in scripture 249 00:22:07.509 --> 00:22:11.230 that is there to indicate that Paul sinned in this matter, or that Jesus 250 00:22:11.230 --> 00:22:18.019 sinned or that, is suppot other disciples and apostles sinned. We confess this 251 00:22:18.140 --> 00:22:22.859 in our own catechism and confessions as well concerning the sixth commandment. But the 252 00:22:22.940 --> 00:22:26.259 duty, one of the duties, that is required in the sixth commandment, 253 00:22:26.619 --> 00:22:32.410 is to pres deserve our own life and the lives of others. Now, 254 00:22:32.529 --> 00:22:36.410 this doesn't mean, of course, that we will be able to avoid every 255 00:22:36.490 --> 00:22:40.970 moment of suffering. It's simply not going to happen. Didn't happen for Jesus, 256 00:22:41.049 --> 00:22:45.680 it didn't happen for Paul. Sometimes we find ourselves and situations where there's 257 00:22:45.720 --> 00:22:52.839 simply no fleeing and nothing is left but perhaps even to die. But just 258 00:22:52.960 --> 00:22:57.000 because you will get thorns in this life doesn't mean that God requires you but 259 00:22:57.119 --> 00:23:02.349 to live in a thorn Bush. It doesn't mean that you must do that. 260 00:23:03.430 --> 00:23:07.750 Just the opposite, as we confess about the sixth commandment, as God, 261 00:23:07.829 --> 00:23:11.589 the Lord, our husband in heaven, has himself commanded, we are 262 00:23:11.670 --> 00:23:17.059 to preserve our lives and the lives of others. Wives are called to submit 263 00:23:17.140 --> 00:23:21.380 to their husband's as to the Lord. But these two authorities, my friends, 264 00:23:21.380 --> 00:23:25.980 are not equal. You might have two kings, but that doesn't necessarily 265 00:23:26.059 --> 00:23:33.650 mean they have equal authority. Your husband is important, but more important this 266 00:23:33.890 --> 00:23:37.970 passage and the whole of scripture teaches us, is your husband who is in 267 00:23:37.130 --> 00:23:41.440 heaven. Of course, your husband who is in heaven tells you that to 268 00:23:41.519 --> 00:23:47.599 submit to the authorities under which he has placed you, to civil authorities, 269 00:23:47.640 --> 00:23:53.640 religious authorities, to our authorities in our homes, but he also calls us 270 00:23:53.640 --> 00:23:59.750 to preserve our lives and the lives of others. Remember Jonathan, how he 271 00:23:59.910 --> 00:24:07.109 refused to bring David to his father, who was a king multiple levels. 272 00:24:07.190 --> 00:24:14.619 Jonathan was required to submit, was required to submit in all things to his 273 00:24:14.779 --> 00:24:18.099 father and his king, but Jonathan, in a holy and rightful way, 274 00:24:18.339 --> 00:24:26.250 refused this. Refuse this. Why? Because he knew that he was required 275 00:24:26.289 --> 00:24:30.009 to obey his heavenly father and he's eternal king, even more than Saul, 276 00:24:30.809 --> 00:24:37.799 and so in doing so, he preserved the life of David. Now I 277 00:24:37.920 --> 00:24:44.559 realize that this doesn't tell you what you need to do in every single instance 278 00:24:44.680 --> 00:24:49.319 of life. There's no possible wake we could possibly cover that in one sermon 279 00:24:49.359 --> 00:24:55.710 or even inten sermons. In difficult situations there are choices to be made. 280 00:24:55.829 --> 00:24:57.309 What to do in the short term, what to do in the long term, 281 00:24:57.789 --> 00:25:02.950 what action should be taken now, what actions should simply be prepared for? 282 00:25:03.109 --> 00:25:06.349 We can't deal with all of these tonight, but we can lay down 283 00:25:06.950 --> 00:25:11.539 principles. The Lord tells us to be wise and how we walk. A 284 00:25:11.539 --> 00:25:17.259 lot of times, how we walk is according to principles, according to the 285 00:25:17.339 --> 00:25:22.609 paths that he has been laid down. So let us be clear. This 286 00:25:22.890 --> 00:25:27.089 passage, nor any other passage in scriptures, teaches that abuse of a person 287 00:25:27.769 --> 00:25:33.130 is okay in the context of a marriage or any other situation. It is 288 00:25:33.170 --> 00:25:37.960 a sin against the Lord, and in the context of marriage it breaks the 289 00:25:37.079 --> 00:25:42.680 marriage covenant. Those who abuse their wives lose the privilege of having wives, 290 00:25:44.480 --> 00:25:48.279 just as a man who abuses his body no longer has the privilege of using 291 00:25:48.359 --> 00:25:52.109 his body. If you hurt yourself, if you harm yourself, if you 292 00:25:52.190 --> 00:25:55.910 cut off your leg, then you don't get a leg anymore. It's similarly 293 00:25:56.910 --> 00:26:03.190 true with our wives. And if you are facing a situation where you are 294 00:26:03.230 --> 00:26:08.740 being told otherwise, where a passage like this is being used as a sake 295 00:26:08.859 --> 00:26:15.099 to normalize something that is not normal, I'm to make okay. Something that 296 00:26:15.299 --> 00:26:22.049 is not okay, then you are right to report it. You should report 297 00:26:22.089 --> 00:26:26.890 it to let your shepherds, both civil and religious, know that you are 298 00:26:26.130 --> 00:26:32.769 in trouble and are in danger and that you need help. And it is 299 00:26:32.880 --> 00:26:36.559 my commitment and the commitment of the elders of this church to be there for 300 00:26:36.759 --> 00:26:41.720 you and to watch over you and protect you, as the Lord has called 301 00:26:41.759 --> 00:26:45.920 us to do. And if you are an abuser, know that the Lord 302 00:26:45.960 --> 00:26:52.710 will not stand for it. There is repentance and salvation for you in Christ. 303 00:26:52.750 --> 00:26:56.630 As we saying earlier, Christ is a savior here and he can save 304 00:26:56.829 --> 00:27:03.619 even the vilest of sinners. Paul himself was an abuser, not that we 305 00:27:03.740 --> 00:27:11.339 know, against his wife, but against the very church of God. Christ 306 00:27:11.539 --> 00:27:17.930 forgives, Christ saves. And if you recognize that in your heart you have 307 00:27:18.009 --> 00:27:22.089 been sinning against those whom you have been called to love, that you've been 308 00:27:22.130 --> 00:27:26.289 sinning against the Lord. If you feel the prick and your conscience and you 309 00:27:26.410 --> 00:27:30.160 feel the concern and worry for your soul, do not cover it up, 310 00:27:32.000 --> 00:27:36.839 but repent. Come and speak to me or one of the elders of this 311 00:27:37.039 --> 00:27:41.720 church and we will guide you and help you. But know also that just 312 00:27:41.880 --> 00:27:48.150 as Christ is savior of those who come to in faith, he's also savior 313 00:27:48.230 --> 00:27:52.509 and protector of his children, and he will not be mocked. The Lord 314 00:27:52.549 --> 00:28:02.779 Jesus says, vengeance is mine and I will repay. Are we clear? 315 00:28:03.779 --> 00:28:08.859 I hope we're clear on this. If you're not, that's okay. I 316 00:28:10.019 --> 00:28:12.930 know that there are a lot of difficult and challenging things surrounding these issues. 317 00:28:14.849 --> 00:28:18.130 Come and talk to me, come and talk to one of your elders. 318 00:28:19.250 --> 00:28:23.329 Now, why have I said all this in light of this passage? For 319 00:28:23.529 --> 00:28:27.720 this reason, to Vind Kate the honor of Christ and to bring clarity, 320 00:28:27.759 --> 00:28:33.839 as were, to his word. Where evil men and people, I've sought 321 00:28:33.880 --> 00:28:41.240 to smear him and poison the things of that are good. It is absolutely 322 00:28:41.430 --> 00:28:47.950 true that people have abused this text as a pretense for personal abuse, but 323 00:28:48.069 --> 00:28:52.869 it is also true that people use the fact of personal abuse as a pretense 324 00:28:52.230 --> 00:28:57.579 for abusing this text. It works both ways. You don't let me put 325 00:28:57.619 --> 00:29:03.819 it another way, because this scripture does not teach the evil. Are Sorry, 326 00:29:03.900 --> 00:29:08.339 because this scripture does not teach the evil that is sometimes attributed to it, 327 00:29:08.420 --> 00:29:14.890 it is wrong for us to reject it on that basis. The abuse 328 00:29:14.970 --> 00:29:19.490 of scripture for sinful friend sinful ends is an old trick of the devil and 329 00:29:19.650 --> 00:29:25.200 ought to be called one. Those devils who take the things of God's word 330 00:29:25.319 --> 00:29:29.559 and Trist the twist them for their own sins are not only disobedient to the 331 00:29:29.599 --> 00:29:33.960 will of God, they are blasphemers, they are tricksters and they hurt those 332 00:29:33.000 --> 00:29:37.559 who are under their control. Teaching the scriptures in this way means they ought 333 00:29:37.589 --> 00:29:41.910 to have a millstone tied around their neck and drowned in the sea, or 334 00:29:42.069 --> 00:29:48.150 worse, to use the words of Jesus. So those who wish to use 335 00:29:48.269 --> 00:29:55.539 this passage in this way away with them. Do not mistake they're beastly lusts 336 00:29:55.900 --> 00:30:03.660 for the holy will of God. That's what I have to say about abuse. 337 00:30:06.660 --> 00:30:11.170 The second reason, I think sometimes in this is perhaps a toning down 338 00:30:11.210 --> 00:30:15.650 a little bit. Second reason we have concerns about passages like this have to 339 00:30:15.690 --> 00:30:21.480 deal with complications and challenging situations, and I'll spend much less time on this. 340 00:30:22.119 --> 00:30:27.079 Some of US struggled because you are in very challenging situations. You struggle 341 00:30:27.160 --> 00:30:30.400 to know how such a commandment can be filled in such and such a situation, 342 00:30:32.440 --> 00:30:34.599 and I, as I mentioned earlier, don't want to ignore these challenges 343 00:30:34.640 --> 00:30:38.630 or just walk away from them, but we do recognize, but we have 344 00:30:38.789 --> 00:30:45.710 to recognize that success in that to have success in the difficult things, we 345 00:30:45.869 --> 00:30:51.700 need to start from clear principles. To put it another way, just because 346 00:30:51.740 --> 00:30:57.140 certain applications of the law are difficult doesn't make a law invalid. Think about 347 00:30:57.140 --> 00:31:00.740 it. Is there a single law that you can think of, any law 348 00:31:00.779 --> 00:31:06.130 at all, of let's say the Ten Commandments, on which are very plain 349 00:31:06.329 --> 00:31:11.410 and clear? Can you pick any one of them and find that any one 350 00:31:11.490 --> 00:31:18.240 of them is free of any ethically complicated aspects or challenging situations to navigate? 351 00:31:19.079 --> 00:31:22.920 Not a single one. Pick up any commentary on the Ten Commandments, go 352 00:31:23.160 --> 00:31:27.480 through those sections and you will find that there are very challenging and difficult questions 353 00:31:29.200 --> 00:31:33.710 with all of them. This is true even of physical laws. What if, 354 00:31:33.710 --> 00:31:37.190 every time you saw a balloon rise up into the air, you throw 355 00:31:37.190 --> 00:31:40.190 up your hands and said, well, I give up, this gravity thing 356 00:31:40.269 --> 00:31:45.029 must not be real. Right. We don't act that way. This is 357 00:31:45.109 --> 00:31:51.259 what we don't nullify a perfectly clear law by exceptions and difficult situations, things 358 00:31:51.339 --> 00:31:55.539 that are hard to understand. This is a good principle of wisdom, by 359 00:31:55.539 --> 00:32:00.019 the way, for dealing with any aspect of God's law. One thing to 360 00:32:00.099 --> 00:32:07.250 add to that something that's very remarkable about this passage. It's remarkable in its 361 00:32:07.490 --> 00:32:14.650 unremarkableness. Let me put it this way. The context in which the letter 362 00:32:14.690 --> 00:32:21.079 to the Ephesian Church was written was extremely different from our own in many ways. 363 00:32:22.440 --> 00:32:25.759 Typical age for I'm going to put this in quotes for those of are 364 00:32:25.799 --> 00:32:34.390 listening online or something. Women got married was about fourteen years old average, 365 00:32:35.910 --> 00:32:40.430 sometimes as early as twelve, sometimes as late as eighteen. That's from girls, 366 00:32:40.549 --> 00:32:45.380 young girls, young women got married, and those who married them were 367 00:32:45.420 --> 00:32:52.059 typically not that much older, but somewhat older, and sometimes a fair amount. 368 00:32:52.900 --> 00:32:57.259 Very common occurrence would be to have, in eighteen, nineteen, twenty 369 00:32:57.259 --> 00:33:02.170 year old young man marrying a fourteen year old, a girl. Lots of 370 00:33:02.210 --> 00:33:07.930 other difficulties and differences as well. In the ancient world, in Paul's time, 371 00:33:07.410 --> 00:33:10.970 you had about a fifty percent chance of living past six years old. 372 00:33:13.599 --> 00:33:17.839 That's it. And Eighty two, eighty five percent of people in the ancient 373 00:33:17.880 --> 00:33:24.039 world were subsistence farmers. They lived hand to mouth, eating and living off 374 00:33:24.119 --> 00:33:31.269 of what they grew, and if they couldn't make that happen, then you're 375 00:33:31.509 --> 00:33:38.589 lost. Malnutrition was an immensely big problem and for women in particular, iron 376 00:33:38.670 --> 00:33:45.380 deficiencies were where a problem and caused all kinds of health problems, and during 377 00:33:45.500 --> 00:33:52.579 menstruation and pregnancy at these things were only only got worse. All this to 378 00:33:52.660 --> 00:33:58.130 say that family life in the ancient world is very different than family life today, 379 00:33:58.930 --> 00:34:01.930 and I won't do this now, but I would encourage you to take 380 00:34:02.049 --> 00:34:07.369 these facts that I've given to you and just set yourself in that situation. 381 00:34:07.250 --> 00:34:13.079 Imagine the kinds of decisions that you would make or not make, a knowing 382 00:34:13.199 --> 00:34:17.239 that this was just how your life was. Many men, for example, 383 00:34:17.320 --> 00:34:21.679 most people didn't live past thirty, but if you were in your s as 384 00:34:21.719 --> 00:34:24.309 a man, this would be unusual and you would have had two or three 385 00:34:24.789 --> 00:34:30.989 lives by this time, because they would have died. This is just life 386 00:34:30.110 --> 00:34:36.150 in the ancient world. It was very, very different, and yet at 387 00:34:36.230 --> 00:34:39.980 the same time this passage, though given to the EPHESIAN church at this time, 388 00:34:40.900 --> 00:34:49.179 has been a healthfully applied and useful for generation after generation after generation of 389 00:34:49.300 --> 00:34:53.690 God's people, even to today. What's one thing that's remarkable about this passage 390 00:34:54.690 --> 00:35:00.210 is how little it says. That very fact that you might find frustrating. 391 00:35:00.289 --> 00:35:05.809 Why don't you say more? You can get more if you go other places, 392 00:35:06.570 --> 00:35:10.360 go to theological commentators, go to aristotle and others, and they'll go 393 00:35:10.719 --> 00:35:15.400 on and on and on about all the various ways in which this is played 394 00:35:15.440 --> 00:35:22.710 out. God lays down these very simple in a way, principles and we 395 00:35:22.829 --> 00:35:29.269 are called to find wisdom to apply them. Yes, that means there are 396 00:35:29.349 --> 00:35:32.550 difficult challenges and situations, but they are written in a way that they apply 397 00:35:32.909 --> 00:35:37.739 cross culturally in every time and in every situation, and it's our job to 398 00:35:37.860 --> 00:35:45.380 figure out how that works. This is one of the blessings of God's word 399 00:35:45.460 --> 00:35:51.130 and one of the ways in which Christ is ruling over us. The final 400 00:35:51.210 --> 00:35:57.289 thing I'll mention is that we struggle with is the world. Some of US 401 00:35:57.289 --> 00:36:01.690 struggle with this passage because the culture that we live in is so set against 402 00:36:01.730 --> 00:36:07.119 it at this particular moment. But, if I can be frank again, 403 00:36:07.239 --> 00:36:10.920 do you really want to take your cues from the world? Is that the 404 00:36:12.000 --> 00:36:15.840 place you want to go to for wisdom and guidance on what is good and 405 00:36:15.920 --> 00:36:22.349 what is not? The world is not a stable place. It's wisdom is 406 00:36:22.510 --> 00:36:29.789 constantly changing and moving the world, and right now, I think in particular, 407 00:36:29.869 --> 00:36:36.179 is all topsy turvy, perhaps arguably even more than musical usual. Many 408 00:36:36.219 --> 00:36:39.099 Americans especially, and perhaps the ones we hear from the most, simply don't 409 00:36:39.099 --> 00:36:44.460 know their right hand from their left. They say up as down and dawn 410 00:36:44.699 --> 00:36:50.690 is up. They claim foolish things for enlightened things, things like there are 411 00:36:50.730 --> 00:36:53.730 no such thing as men or women, that we can live forever, but 412 00:36:53.809 --> 00:36:57.969 there's no limit to what we can accomplish, and on and on and on 413 00:36:58.289 --> 00:37:04.000 and on it goes. Friends. Yes, the world will be raving mad 414 00:37:04.280 --> 00:37:08.400 with you if you affirm this truth. Your neighbors, people in the grocery 415 00:37:08.440 --> 00:37:14.280 store, folks that TV will roll their eyes accuse you of things, all 416 00:37:14.360 --> 00:37:19.429 kinds of things, for living your life according to the simple rules of the 417 00:37:19.510 --> 00:37:24.829 word. And I'll tell you it's not fun, but you can't let it 418 00:37:24.949 --> 00:37:36.739 bother you and you don't need to fix the madness in the world's mind before 419 00:37:36.820 --> 00:37:43.699 being settled in your own. They will mock us, but you know what, 420 00:37:45.170 --> 00:37:50.250 they're also going to be blessed by us. When stable families, the 421 00:37:50.289 --> 00:37:54.449 Christians, produce and loving homes and good, dutiful children. These things end 422 00:37:54.489 --> 00:37:59.440 up redounding to the glory of God, Yes, but also to the state, 423 00:38:00.639 --> 00:38:05.079 and there are benefits the society reaps from stable, healthy, happy families. 424 00:38:06.280 --> 00:38:10.519 Does that sound unfair, to be mocked and then to return blessing back? 425 00:38:12.840 --> 00:38:17.670 Well, yeah, it is. Is it full of grace? Absolutely 426 00:38:20.190 --> 00:38:27.030 so. Let's have at it. I hope you find these things, I'm 427 00:38:27.110 --> 00:38:34.460 useful, useful place to start as we think about our lives and submission to 428 00:38:34.539 --> 00:38:38.300 Christ. We don't come at these laws that he gives us in some kind 429 00:38:38.340 --> 00:38:43.969 of arbitrary way. We don't come at them in a prideful way, we 430 00:38:44.050 --> 00:38:47.730 don't come at them through the abuses of sinful people. We come at them 431 00:38:49.050 --> 00:38:52.449 through the goodness that he is doing in our lives, the things that he 432 00:38:52.489 --> 00:38:59.360 has promised in this world. Doesn't always make it easy. Sometimes it's very, 433 00:38:59.440 --> 00:39:05.840 very difficult. But what Paul has been telling us throughout this letter and 434 00:39:06.000 --> 00:39:09.750 even as he speaks to wives and grounds that serve the grounds their submission, 435 00:39:10.670 --> 00:39:15.869 in the fact that it is as unto the Lord and is it example even 436 00:39:15.989 --> 00:39:21.030 of of his leadership in the Church and the church is submission to him. 437 00:39:21.030 --> 00:39:27.619 These wonderfully good things. We are reminded that the the lives in which we 438 00:39:27.860 --> 00:39:32.980 live as Christians are grounded in the salvation that he brought to us through his 439 00:39:34.139 --> 00:39:39.889 life. When you think about your duties as a wife, as a husband, 440 00:39:40.130 --> 00:39:45.130 as a child, as a worker, as a subject of a citizen 441 00:39:46.210 --> 00:39:52.079 of our state, let's learn to think about them in Christian ways, through 442 00:39:52.119 --> 00:39:57.800 the eyes of Christ, who has gone before us, who is our king, 443 00:39:58.039 --> 00:40:01.400 who is seated in the heavenly places, and let us live our lives 444 00:40:01.480 --> 00:40:07.590 as citizens of that kingdom, walking in wisdom, using our time wisely, 445 00:40:08.429 --> 00:40:14.389 desiring to live according to his will and his word, with confidence in him. 446 00:40:15.150 --> 00:40:16.750 He knows how to trust, knows how to take care of us, 447 00:40:17.949 --> 00:40:23.300 protect us, forgive us. Let us pray